Growing Apart
by Allyarra
Summary: "It was a natural part of life, growing up, going to college, and moving away from friends. He'd known it was coming, they all had. He's looking forward to this new chapter of his life, away from Beacon Hills and all of scary, life-threatening supernatural problems he'd been dealing with for the past few years."


The day Stiles leaves Beacon Hills it's hot and muggy out, but that's to be expected in August. It's also a Thursday and about a week before he's due to start classes at UC Berkeley. There's no big group of people waving and crying, there's actually nobody doing that. His dad might have, if he wasn't moving right along with Stiles.

He'd accepted a teaching position at the police academy there, so he could be near Stiles and because the pay was better than a small town Sheriff received, which was good because Stiles had gotten scholarships but that didn't mean college wasn't still expensive. All told, it would be much easier for him to take this new job, even if he would miss being Sheriff. But he was getting on in years and this job would be much less stressful on both of them, enough that Stiles might allow him the occasional curly fry.

Most of their things were already on their way down to their new place in Berkeley, a nice apartment which was close enough to campus that Stiles could visit every day if he wanted to, although it was doubtful that he would. Stiles had still opted to stay in the dorms, just for the full college experience, but he was glad that his dad would be nearby. It made everything easier.

As they drove out of town Stiles only looked back once, in the direction of the cemetery where his mom was buried. That was the only drawback to moving away, they had to leave his mom behind. But they could always visit and they were only renting the house out, his dad fully planned on returning to Beacon Hills once he retired. They'd spent weeks making this decision, they'd planned out all of the possibilities and both of them were looking forward to this change.

Stiles might have been excited for college, but he had still expected to be a little bit more upset to be leaving Beacon Hills behind. After all, it would probably be years before he ever made it back here. But it wasn't hard at all.

Scott had left a few days ago, carpooling with Allison, because they were of course going to school together and their classes started before Stiles'. He'd already said goodbye to Lydia the night before, when they'd hung out, as they did every now and then. The pack he'd said goodbye to when Scott and Allison had done so, because they'd just had a big end of the summer and beginning of college barbeque at the Hale house.

So really, it wasn't all that painful. It was a natural part of life, growing up, going to college, and moving away from friends. He'd known it was coming, they all had. He's looking forward to this new chapter of his life, away from Beacon Hills and all of scary, life-threatening supernatural problems he'd been dealing with for the past few years.

**X**

He makes friends at school pretty easily. He's a little surprised by how easily, actually, because in Beacon Hills he's only ever had a small number of friends at any one time, and Scott was really the only one that stayed the same. It's a pleasant surprise though, to discover that there are people out there who like him for being him, without any conditions on their affections. He likes the normality of it all, that he can just go to class, do homework, hang out with friends, try going to a party or two.

It's different and he loves it. He thrives at college, away from all the people who knew him since he was a baby, who watched him as he dealt with his mom dying and then as an awkward teenager. Here, they don't have any preconceived ideas about him, he can just be himself. It's a breath of fresh air, one that he doesn't take for granted.

It's not like he doesn't still talk to his old friends, but it's different. Lydia's all the way on the East Coast and they skype regularly, and text, but they're not as close as they were that last year of high school. That's to be expected, they were the only humans besides Allison involved with the pack, of course they got close, but now they're not around werewolves 24/7. It's natural that they'd drift apart.

Scott's wrapped up in school, not that Stiles blames him because biology is hard and Scott has to work hard if he wants to go to veterinary school after undergrad. They're still each other's best friend though, that will never change. It just means that Stiles isn't the go to person any more for every little problem, which makes him feel both a little jealous of Allison and relieved. He spent all of high school dealing with the supernatural, he wants a normal college experience.

Those that he left behind in Beacon Hills are a touchier subject, because he really doesn't have much contact with them. He exchanges the occasional email or text with Isaac, but that's about it. If he really wanted to confront that, and he doesn't, he knows he's a little hurt by the lack of contact from Derek. They'd gotten a lot closer over the years, Stiles had expected some contact, not this complete radio silence.

He can accept it, though. Everyone's got to move on with their lives at some point.

**X**

His double major wasn't nailed down until the beginning of his sophomore year. Originally he'd just been a computer science major, but he'd always had a love of history. It just worked out that he could manage a double major. The ridiculous amount of time he spent not sleeping helped, too. Plus, when it came time to study he could focus better than anyone else. Seriously, his freshman year roommate had been a little scared by it.

The minor in mythology was just because he'd spent so much time in high school researching it that he might as well do something with it. The plan once he graduated was to get a Master's in Library and Information Sciences, hopefully from Berkeley too.

He'd found that he loved Berkeley, that it had so much more to offer than Beacon Hills ever had. Stiles has made friends, he'd even had a boyfriend for a few months. That ended amiably enough, he even hangs out with his ex every now and then, they're still friends.

He no longer has contact with Isaac, that kind of tapered off during the summer and stopped some time at the end of August. Contact with Scott is as regular as ever, with weekly skype sessions, but his skype sessions with Lydia have been bumped to every other week. He's okay with that though, he's found that he's okay with a lot of things that used to seem like such a big deal.

Sophomore year itself is even better than freshman, especially since he's got this dinky apartment on the edge of campus with three of his buddies and it's amazing. He spends at least one night a week sleeping at his dad's place though, and all of his friends know his dad and love going to the Stilinski place for dinner.

**X**

Junior year he goes abroad for fall semester. He stays in York and takes the opportunity to travel all throughout Europe. He sends his dad tons of postcards and even the occasional one to Scott. His skype sessions with Lydia are now once a month, and with Scott they're every other week. He almost doesn't want to go home when the semester ends.

He lives with his dad spring semester because he hadn't wanted to sublease a place. It's amazing, because his dad treats him like an adult and he loves hanging out with his dad again, just like they used to. He's got a girlfriend who his dad likes, but he's pretty sure it's not going to work out. They're much better as friends.

At the end of the year he's a little nervous because he doesn't know where the past three years have gone, he's not ready for it to be his senior year. He considers making a trip to Beacon Hills that summer, to visit his mom, but never gets around to it. He's kept too busy with his internship to consider leaving the city for more than a day trip.

**X**

At the end of his senior year Stiles is graduating cumme laude with dual degrees. It's all pretty epic and his dad actually tears up. Scott's even there, since his graduation had taken place the week before. Stiles is pretty sure that this is the best day of his life, the only thing that could have made it better was if his mom had been there. He's been accepted to the Master's program at the Berkeley School of Information. It all feels like his life is finally coming together, that it's finally working out the way he wants it to.

He's got a TA position with the school to help pay for grad school so he gets to spend the summer just enjoying his free time. The first few weeks he hangs out with friends, visiting them and just enjoying life. At the beginning of July is when he decides to visit Beacon Hills and his mom's grave.

His dad's been enjoying Berkeley, has actually been happier these past few years here than he was in Beacon Hills. Part of it's because the stress has been significantly reduced, but part of it is also because he's no longer seeing the ghost of his dead wife everywhere. Stiles has a feeling that it'll be a very long time before his dad goes back to Beacon Hills, if he ever does. Stiles doesn't resent him for that, he's happy for his dad, glad that he's finally happy again.

But he's been thinking about this for a while now. Scott's gone back to Beacon Hills every break because that's where his mom is, and he's still a part of the pack, even if he'll never admit it, so Stiles has been getting updates on them even if he hasn't been talking to them. Still, he's curious to see how things have changed, to see if Derek's really grown into the Alpha that he always had the potential to be. Plus, there are a few new wolves that he'd like to meet.

So he packs up his jeep, which is older and more beat up but still runs just fine, and heads back to Beacon Hills. There's no one staying in the house currently, but he's getting a room at the local bed and breakfast anyway, that house would feel like a mausoleum at this point. He doesn't want to go back to the past, he just wants to see the present state of Beacon Hills.

When he arrives it's already dark and he just picks up some food to eat in his hotel room. He eats and then collapses into bed, exhausted from the drive and more than a little surprised by how little he feels being back here. He supposes that's because he really hasn't seen anything yet and that tomorrow that emotional response will hit, but for now all he wants is to sleep.

It's actually ridiculously difficult to get up the next morning because now that he's actually here, he's not sure that he wants to be. He has some great memories of Beacon Hills, but a lot of what's happened has been awful. This is the place where his mom died, if nothing else. He has to drag himself out of bed and get dressed to head out to the cemetery. It's the first place he has to go to if he wants to be able to do anything else on this little trip down memory lane.

He stops for flowers to bring her on the way and the florist doesn't recognize him even though he used to come here all the time before going to visit his mom. Well, it has been four years since he was here last, he supposes that he's changed a bit. It's not like she knew to expect him or anything.

He doesn't cry when he gets to his mom's grave. It's strange, because he always used to. Instead of that overwhelming grief, the kind that induced panic attacks, there's just a familiar pang in his heart and the warmth of love.

"Hi mom," he says, and he's surprised that the words don't hurt. He can actually talk, can breathe, and that's enough to bring tears to his eyes. "I'm doing well and so is dad."

Talking to his mom is something he never thought he'd really ever be able to do again. He used to try, but it was always too hard. Finally, after all these years, he's come to terms with her death. He's not really sure when it happened, but it has. It's like a weight off his chest, to realize that he has finally got this figured out, this whole not having a mom thing, he can do this successfully. Yeah, he still misses her like crazy, but it's no longer this road block that can keep him from living.

He stays there for over an hour, just talking to his mom, letting her in on all of the news, everything that's changed in the past four years. He knows his dad's been back to visit since they moved away, but he doubts that his dad is strong enough yet to have told her everything. It's peaceful, talking to her, and he loses track of time after a while.

"Stiles?" Isaac calls and that familiar voice is what jolts Stiles back into the present. He'd fallen silent a few minutes ago, lost in his thoughts, and Isaac had surprised him. "Is that you?"

Stiles climbs to his feet and turns to grin at Isaac, who looks almost the same since Stiles has seen him last, just a little more filled in. "Hey Isaac, how are you?"

Isaac doesn't say anything for a long moment, just staring at the other man. "I'm good. What are you doing here?"

"Visiting my mom," Stiles offers up with a shrug. "I've got a break so I figured I'd come back and visit for a few days, see how everything's changed."

"Oh."

"Yeah. Everything still looks pretty much the same though, Beacon Hills never seems to changed."

Isaac looks like he doesn't know how to respond and just kind of shifts from foot to foot awkwardly. That puts Stiles at ease, reminding him of the shy, awkward teenager that he'd known. "Do you still work here?" Stiles asks, to put him at ease.

The relief on Isaac's face is ridiculously transparent. "Yeah, I run it full time now, as well as the place my dad left me."

"Cool. How's the rest of the pack? They doing well?" That question makes Isaac tense again and Stiles has to hide his confusion.

"They're good," Isaac offers up in a hesitant voice that makes it seem more like a question than a statement.

"That's good."

Stiles shifted his weight, feeling uncomfortable in the awkward silence. It had been a long time since he felt the need to fill silences with sound, but he was seriously considering going back to that habit if Isaac didn't say something soon.

"Well, it was nice seeing you again," Stiles finally said and began to walk towards the exit where his jeep was parked.

"Stiles, wait," Isaac said and Stiles paused, glancing back at the other man. "You should get out of town really quickly if you don't want to get pulled back in. There's some stuff going on right now and there's not enough of us to guarantee you won't get pulled in."

Stiles stiffened, not moving at all as he thought about the implications of what Isaac had just said. "Thanks for the warning. I'll leave in the morning."

Isaac nodded in agreement, looking relieved. "Goodbye, Stiles," he said as Stiles walked away and Stiles just raised a hand in response, continuing towards his jeep without looking back.

**X**

He nearly makes it out of town, too. If he hadn't had to stop for gas he would have been free and clear. Instead, he managed to get cornered by a bunch of rogue fairies. Seriously, fairies. He'd thought he'd left this behind him.

Turns out the whole iron thing only bothers them if they're actually touching it, so they manage to get him in the backseat of his own jeep before driving off with him tied up like a pretty present. It's possibly the worst thing that could have happened to him today, but not the absolute worst because he might be out of this life, but he remembers it. He remembers it a little too well if he's being honest (which is pretty rare, even with himself).

The whole kidnapping routine has his heart in his throat, but not like it should be. No, he's relatively calm for a 22 year old who's tied up in the back of his jeep. He shouldn't be, but vivid memories of being tied up and stuffed in much worse places keep him calm. It's sick and wrong that he's taking this in stride, because this isn't his life anymore, and he does not want it to be his life again.

He got out. Four years, four years without the supernatural knocking on his window at all hours and he can't even go a full 48 hours in Beacon Hills before getting kidnapped by fairies. He feels like he should have been able to deal with this better, that he should have been able to escape crazy fairy kidnappers, but at the same time he's glad that he couldn't. It means that he'd truly left this life behind, that he'd actually been able to resume a normal life, and it meant that he could go back to that life when this was over.

**X**

Honestly, he's not surprised at all when they get to the fairies' hideout only to find the pack is already there and waiting for them. He is surprised by the fact that seeing them, seeing Derek, again doesn't hurt. At all. It's nice, but it doesn't hurt like he used to think it would. It's just more confirmation that he really has moved on with his life.

It doesn't take long for the fairies to be dealt with and for Erica to come and untie him. He's actually a little surprised to see Erica there; he'd thought she would have left the pack a few years ago. "Thanks," he says when she uses a claw to slice through the rope that's binding his hands and feet.

"Don't mention it," she quips and backs away so that he can climb out of the jeep. "Seriously, don't. I have so many better qualities for you to talk about."

Stiles kind of just smiles back awkwardly, because he doesn't really know what to say, not anymore. Isaac and Boyd have already disappeared with the remains and Erica nods to Stiles before running off, too. Which just left Derek, Derek who was currently within ten feet of Stiles and apparently that was too close.

"So, thanks for saving me from the fairies and all that," Stiles says, more than a little awkward. Normally he always has something to say, but it seems like time and distance have eaten up anything he could have said. "Not dying is always a good thing."

"They probably wouldn't have killed you."

"Probably? Gee, thanks, that makes me feel so much better," Stiles griped and was surprised to be rewarded with a look of amusement from Derek. Apparently he'd grown a sense of humor in the four years since Stiles had last seen him. "But, ah, it's nice to see you again."

Derek didn't say anything for a long moment, just looking at Stiles as if he could see straight into Stiles soul. Stiles had forgotten how he could do that, just stare at someone until they wanted to spill out all of their deepest secrets and desires. "You've grown."

And the award for most ambiguous and stereotypical response to seeing someone you haven't seen in a long time goes to Derek Hale. "Well, I'm not a teenager anymore. Gotta grow up sometime."

Derek doesn't say anything else and the silence stretches between them, less awkward and tense than the silences that Stiles remembers. He wonders if Derek is thinking about those last few months before Stiles left, how they'd actually been growing closer, how they'd talk, sometimes, when Derek had appeared in his room at night. Stiles would be lying if he said he'd never thought back to that summer and wondered what if.

What would have happened between them if Stiles hadn't left, or even if Stiles had come back just for breaks. He had a feeling that eventually the two of them would have ended up in bed together, or in some other situation just as intimate. Sometimes he regrets that, regrets not having formed a deep enough attachment while he was here that his relationship with Derek had survived his leaving. But most of the time he doesn't really think about it. It's a part of the past now, an option that Stiles never fully understood was available until it was too late to take it.

"I should probably be going, I've got a long drive ahead of me," he says, because he honestly doesn't know what else to say or even do. "Tell the rest of the pack that I said thanks and bye."

"Okay," Derek says and he just stands there, watching as Stiles climbs into the driver's seat of the jeep. Right before Stiles closes the door he hears Derek say "goodbye Stiles" and for a moment he doesn't know what to do. There are too many options here, too many thoughts flying through his head to be able to make a quick judgment, not that he's ever been good at those. In the end he just closes the door and puts the keys in the ignition, there's nothing he can say anyway. All Derek said was goodbye.

He starts the jeep and then turns it around, heading back through the woods toward the highway. Stiles keeps glancing in the rearview mirror as he drives away, looking at Derek who doesn't move until after Stiles can no longer see him. It's surprisingly intense, the way that Derek just stands and watches, and Stiles is glad when he can no longer feel the weight of his gaze drilling through the jeep to make the hairs on the back of Stiles' neck stand on end.

The drive back to Berkeley is uneventful, almost disappointingly so if Stiles hadn't had a close call with fairies just that morning. That thought is what bothers him the most, that a quiet drive is boring. Sure, long drives always are, but he shouldn't be comparing it to fairy kidnappings. That part of his life is over. He'd just said goodbye to it all over again, after all.

**X**

It's been a little more than two years since that last trip to Beacon Hills when Stiles finally has some contact with them again. He's got his masters by this point, having graduated just a few months ago. He's got an amazing job in LA, where it is constantly sunny, even if he misses green and clean, fresh air. He loves the people though, he's always loved people.

But really, it's his job that he loves the most. He's always surrounded by knowledge, old knowledge that's just there for him to explore, as one of the librarians in the archive department of the LA Public Library. It's pretty much his dream job. But it's not there that he runs into his past.

He's at a club downtown with his girlfriend because it's Friday night and she's wanted to go there ever since it opened. Clubs aren't really his thing, even though he's been to more than a few of them. It's just that there's no intimacy to them, just a large group of strangers thrashing to ridiculously loud music in a hot, overcrowded room with flashing lights that are just enough to make out the face of the person you're dancing with. They're nice every now and then, but he doesn't like to go very often. He makes an exception this time for Lizzy.

And ends up wishing he'd stayed home and played video games all night instead of going out. Because they're there for maybe half an hour before everything goes to hell.

The first one he sees is Erica, which isn't surprising because she's always loved these places just because they'd once been denied to her. He can see her in the middle of the dance floor from where he's standing on the second floor balcony. She's dancing with what seems like five different guys at once and at first he thinks it's just a coincidence, that nothing's wrong. Then he sees Isaac and Jackson cutting through the crowd, heading towards Erica with a purpose. His stomach sinks like lead and he turns to try and find Lizzy, to tell her that they need to leave. He has a bad feeling that the evening just took a turn for the supernatural.

"Babe, we just got here!" Lizzy shouts into his ear, rolling her eyes at him. She claims that for someone who likes people in general he sure has a weird way of showing it. "Relax and you might start having fun!"

He shakes his head at her, trying to convey the urgency with which he really, really wants to leave this place, but she just laughs. He'd turned his back to the dance floor below them in order to talk with her and he should have known that that was stupid. A rookie mistake and he might be out of practice, but he's no longer an amateur. Lizzy is the one who spots the commotion because of that mistake, even though he'd been the one to know it was coming.

She screams and he turns around to see a fight taking place in the middle of the dance floor, where he had just seen Erica dancing. His heart jumps into his throat because he can't see any of them, only masses rolling together under flashing lights. The thought crosses his mind that it's strange that he cares as much as he used to, that the distance and time might have dulled his attachment to the pack as a whole and his reflexes, but that doesn't mean he ever stopped caring. Lizzy is still screaming and it makes it hard to think so he gathers her close to him, with the pretense of embracing her to calm her down, but mostly to block her view of the carnage and to muffle her screeching.

They stand together on the balcony as he watches the fight below slowly begin to make sense. It's not terribly surprising that he can see bodies on the floor once enough people have cleared out. He's not sure exactly what's happening, or why it's happening in such a public place but anxiety is gnawing at his insides. The pack should not be fighting like this, especially not in public, and he doesn't even know why they're in LA. He'd thought they were all still in Beacon Hills, at least that was what he'd last heard from Scott.

Then, as suddenly as it started, it's over and Stiles is watching the backs of the pack as they melt back into the crowd, leaving bodies in their wake. He wants to let go of Lizzy and run after them, demand to know what the hell is going on. Then he spots Derek for the first time that night, as he pauses before leaving to survey the club. For a moment Stiles is certain that Derek has spotted him as their eyes meet, but Derek's eyes just keep moving as if he hadn't noticed just who he had made eye contact with. The next moment Derek is gone, too, and Stiles is left in the chaos of the club in the aftermath of a supernatural event.

**X**

Lizzy broke up with him about eight months after the incident at the club. They'd both known it was coming and as far as he was aware, neither of them was very emotional over it. In fact, he had plans with her next week to just hang out with a group of friends and they'd only broken up a few weeks ago. It was a pattern in his life that romantic relationships tended to end up in friendship. He still occasionally talks to his first boyfriend and another of his ex-girlfriends was the one who got him an interview at the library.

He's 25 years old now and happy with his life, even if he sometimes wishes it was a little more exciting. Those years of constant adrenaline high have ruined his idea of exciting, even now. It's the reason why none of his relationships have lasted. Sure, they all end amicably and only once or twice have they really hurt for long, but they pretty much all end for the same reason.

Stiles can't sit still sometimes, and it's not because he needs to take his Adderall. He starts craving danger, excitement, and inevitably ends up coming up with these crazy plans that just start getting too much for his significant other. Sometimes he wonders if they've noticed that he almost always comes up with these plans around the full moon, as if he's still part werewolf, still a part of a pack. They don't notice though, or at least they never mention it, but they all end up breaking up with him claiming that they love him and all, but they can't deal with his levels of crazy sometimes.

The thing is, he totally understands. Sometimes he wishes he could leave his crazy behind, too. He'd fooled himself into thinking he had for all those years and now he knows how wrong he was. Well, not completely wrong. He likes his life, he's been happy, but now he knows just how much he likes excitement, too. Generally he just calls up Scott when it gets to be too much and they go and just do something together, to let out all of their pent up energy. Because Scott understands more than anyone what Stiles feels in this case.

Stiles is more than aware of the fact that he could be happy, will be happy, living out his life without being involved in the supernatural, only having brief brushes with it. It doesn't mean that he doesn't wonder what would happen if he contacted the pack one day. If he just called them up and told them he wanted in.

At this point he would be an asset. He's got access to a ridiculous amount of information, is trained in how to find and interpret more. He remembers just how vital it was to be on the side with the most information, and the most accurate information. The skills he used to bring to the pack are all still there, and most of them have even been refined and nurtured so much that they're even better than they were before. He thinks about that sometimes. But the phone call remains unmade.

* * *

A/N: So this is my take on the Stiles-leaves-the-pack-behind-without-contact-for-years-before-he-somehow-ends-up-in-Beacon-Hills-again story. I tried to make it as in character and canon compliant as possible. Because people do have to grow up at some point and growing apart is a natural part of life.


End file.
